Control
Coffee. She needed coffee. There was so much to do. Wash sheets. Put away laundry. What was for dinner? Jared said something about salmon. Did they have salmon? Maybe in the freezer.
The mirror in the bathroom was dirty. She’ll have to clean that too. The toothpaste was almost empty. Where was Jared’s toothbrush? She’ll add shopping to the list too. Or maybe Jared could stop on his way home. What else could he get? Milk. Eggs. Chocolate chip cookies. A treat for both of them.
Or maybe they could go out. She could make a reservation. Kismet was their favourite. It’s where Jared proposed. They we regulars. Call restaurant - added to the list.
Daylight illuminated the white cupboards in the kitchen. It was blinding. Something smelled. Rotten. Looked like the fridge door was left open. How many times did she have to warn Jared? The spring was wonky, he knew. Good thing it was almost empty. Nothing rotten here. Add veggies, cold cuts, and fruit to shopping.
Maybe the garbage needed taking out. She flipped open the can. Putrid. Jared forgot to take out the garbage too. She had talked to him about this. If only he woke up 10 minutes earlier, he would have more time. Time to close the fridge, take out the garbage, leave a good day note on the island. Take out garbage added.
First, coffee.
She grabbed the pot to fill. Turn on faucet. No water. What? Where’s the water? She tried the cold water. Nothing again. Are you serious? Call landlord. Call Jared. He pays the bills. He never forgets. How could he forget?
She threw the pot into the sink and heard a crack. New coffee pot added to shopping. But it didn’t matter. They had no water. Why the hell don’t they have any water?
She searched for her phone. Someone would have to fix it that day. Where was her phone? She moved into the living room. Clothes everywhere. All Jareds it seemed. There had to be something wrong because he was never this messy, or forgetful.
She pushed the clothes off the couch onto the floor. His smell filled the air. It was the cologne she bought for him on their last anniversary. He didn’t like it at first, but it grew on him. It sent her wild.
No phone in the couch, between the seats or behind the throw pillows. Live, Laugh, Love. She hated the pillows almost as much as she hated not being able to find her phone. Where did she last put it? She came up blank.
Under the coffee table, on the tv stand, maybe on the bookshelves? Nothing.
Back to the bedroom. Maybe under her pillow. Or Jareds if she fell asleep tucked under his chin. The curtains were still drawn, she flicked on the light.
No. Fucking. Light.
Rage surged up. Something was very wrong. She drew the curtains open, more blinding sun filled the room and she stopped. Dead. The place was trashed. There was definitely a smell coming from here too. When was the last time she washed the sheets? It couldn’t have been that long and it couldn’t be the source of the sour smell.
She ripped the sheets off the bed. No phone. Probably the closet. It was her favourite part of the house. Jared built it when they moved it. Took every woman’s dreams and made it a reality for her. The closet was dark too, no windows in there. She felt around the shelves, the sparkly golden handles poking the palm of her palm as she ran her hands across each unit.
It had to be in here. She needed to call Jared. This place was falling apart and of course it had to be on her day off.
There, in the corner. A small flash of light and a vibration heard in the direction of the 360 mirror. Of course! How could she have forgotten, she came here last night to put away her rain boots. She was so tired she must have forgotten it there.
Another vibration. Someone was trying to get in touch with her. Jared of course.
Unlock phone. 10 missed calls. 14 text messages. 3 voicemails. Phone hanging on at 1%. Her heart began to race.
She had no power. Maybe there was an outlet in the hall she could plug her phone into, just for some juice.
7 missed calls from Mom, 1 from a strange number and two from their landlord. Probably about the water and electricity. A little forgiveness was allocated to Jared.
Switch to messages. Text one; Mom
Honey, it’s Mom. We’re worried. Please call us!
Worried? Call her? They talked on the phone just yesterday. Every lunch time in fact. What was she on about. Maybe something happened to her, or dad.
Text two; Mom, again
This isn’t funny anymore. Call me back.
Three; Dad
You’re mother is worried sick. Why do you keep doing this to her? Call her. Now.
Four; Landlord Joe
FINAL WARNING. You’ve skipped out on your last two rent payments and we got a call from hydro and water that they’re shutting you off. If you cannot come up with the money by Friday, then you’re out.
Five; Dad, again
That’s it. If you don’t want our help then fine. I can’t watch you destroy your mother like this.
Her phone froze for a moment before the screen turned black and she was submerged into darkness once again.
What. The. Fuck. Was going on?
Where was Jared? Why was she getting eviction notices and threats from her father?
She needed light. Candle. There was one on Jared’s bedside table and a lighter in the drawer.
The candle was there but the dust mixed with dry wax on the wick made it terribly difficult to light.
She walked back into the closet. The warm glow emanating from the candle didn’t calm her nerves. Something was clearly wrong and she had no idea. She went to sleep and everything was normal, but then when she woke up it was like she was transported into an alternate reality. Maybe even a dreamstate.
More like a nightmare. Come to think of it. The idea of a nightmare sounded more and more plausible. The smell, the missing payments, the eviction. There was no way it was reality. They never missed a payment in their lives.
Jared’s side of the closet was a disaster. Everything was everywhere. His shoes littered the floor, it was surprising she didn’t trip on her way in before.
His sweaters were also everywhere. Thrown into corners, hanging off of door handles. A significant pile was growing beside the mirror. He didn’t mention having a meeting this morning but maybe he couldn’t figure out what to wear. There were more than enough times it looked like the closet just decided to throw up her clothes.
She walked over and kneeled down to run her fingers through the pile, feeling the soft material of each sweater, letting his smell fill her senses. She missed him. An ache deep down slammed against her heart and she gasped. It felt like she hadn’t seen him in forever. A yearning like none she’s even felt before threatened to rip her in half.
He didn’t call. Or message. It wasn’t lost on her.
Standing up, she caught her reflection almost shrieked. Was that her? Hair matted, oily, plastered to her head. Face blotchy, grey and treading very close to sickly. Was that Jared’s sweater she was wearing? Was she also wearing his pj pants too? She looked down. A weird stain above the left side of her chest.
Something gold caught her eye. Jared’s ring on a chain around her neck. Ring. Jared’s ring.
A wave of emotions. Memories invaded her mind.
Jared yelling. Jared leaving. A dangerous windstorm. Rain and hail pelting down from the heavens. Jared not coming home. A call. Jared won’t be coming home. Make plans. Black. Lots of black. It was all black. Someone make sure she eats. Someone make sure she showers. Did you go to work today? No. How about today? No. Maybe it’s time. Ok. Maybe it’s too soon. Yes. Too soon. Too soon written in stone. Too soon playing on the radio. Too soon written in books, in letters, in text messages, and poems, and verses and all over everything in her head. Get up. No more. Continue living. Don’t make me. Life goes on. Everyone moves on. Jared’s never coming home.
Let me take over. A voice. Familiar, wading at the edge of her mind. Playing with strings attached to her fingers, her toes, her arms, her legs.
You need me to take over. Coxing, pushing. Playing with the strings attached to her heart, her mind, her consciousness.
Jared is gone. He’s been gone for a long time. But you can’t handle it. I can. Let me handle it for you. Rest.
Jared is gone. She clutched the ring. Cold. Metal. It was just metal.
I can take over. Rest. Just rest.
The ring ignited in her hands. A hot searing pain. A black spot burned into her palm. Tears pricking the corners of her eyes.
Jared gone.
The voice yanked at each string and she give up control.
Rest it said forcefully. She succumbed.
Write a story that involves a mystery — it doesn't need to be crime-related, it should just include something that remains unexplained until the end.
The mirror in the bathroom was dirty. She’ll have to clean that too. The toothpaste was almost empty. Where was Jared’s toothbrush? She’ll add shopping to the list too. Or maybe Jared could stop on his way home. What else could he get? Milk. Eggs. Chocolate chip cookies. A treat for both of them.
Or maybe they could go out. She could make a reservation. Kismet was their favourite. It’s where Jared proposed. They we regulars. Call restaurant - added to the list.
Daylight illuminated the white cupboards in the kitchen. It was blinding. Something smelled. Rotten. Looked like the fridge door was left open. How many times did she have to warn Jared? The spring was wonky, he knew. Good thing it was almost empty. Nothing rotten here. Add veggies, cold cuts, and fruit to shopping.
Maybe the garbage needed taking out. She flipped open the can. Putrid. Jared forgot to take out the garbage too. She had talked to him about this. If only he woke up 10 minutes earlier, he would have more time. Time to close the fridge, take out the garbage, leave a good day note on the island. Take out garbage added.
First, coffee.
She grabbed the pot to fill. Turn on faucet. No water. What? Where’s the water? She tried the cold water. Nothing again. Are you serious? Call landlord. Call Jared. He pays the bills. He never forgets. How could he forget?
She threw the pot into the sink and heard a crack. New coffee pot added to shopping. But it didn’t matter. They had no water. Why the hell don’t they have any water?
She searched for her phone. Someone would have to fix it that day. Where was her phone? She moved into the living room. Clothes everywhere. All Jareds it seemed. There had to be something wrong because he was never this messy, or forgetful.
She pushed the clothes off the couch onto the floor. His smell filled the air. It was the cologne she bought for him on their last anniversary. He didn’t like it at first, but it grew on him. It sent her wild.
No phone in the couch, between the seats or behind the throw pillows. Live, Laugh, Love. She hated the pillows almost as much as she hated not being able to find her phone. Where did she last put it? She came up blank.
Under the coffee table, on the tv stand, maybe on the bookshelves? Nothing.
Back to the bedroom. Maybe under her pillow. Or Jareds if she fell asleep tucked under his chin. The curtains were still drawn, she flicked on the light.
No. Fucking. Light.
Rage surged up. Something was very wrong. She drew the curtains open, more blinding sun filled the room and she stopped. Dead. The place was trashed. There was definitely a smell coming from here too. When was the last time she washed the sheets? It couldn’t have been that long and it couldn’t be the source of the sour smell.
She ripped the sheets off the bed. No phone. Probably the closet. It was her favourite part of the house. Jared built it when they moved it. Took every woman’s dreams and made it a reality for her. The closet was dark too, no windows in there. She felt around the shelves, the sparkly golden handles poking the palm of her palm as she ran her hands across each unit.
It had to be in here. She needed to call Jared. This place was falling apart and of course it had to be on her day off.
There, in the corner. A small flash of light and a vibration heard in the direction of the 360 mirror. Of course! How could she have forgotten, she came here last night to put away her rain boots. She was so tired she must have forgotten it there.
Another vibration. Someone was trying to get in touch with her. Jared of course.
Unlock phone. 10 missed calls. 14 text messages. 3 voicemails. Phone hanging on at 1%. Her heart began to race.
She had no power. Maybe there was an outlet in the hall she could plug her phone into, just for some juice.
7 missed calls from Mom, 1 from a strange number and two from their landlord. Probably about the water and electricity. A little forgiveness was allocated to Jared.
Switch to messages. Text one; Mom
Honey, it’s Mom. We’re worried. Please call us!
Worried? Call her? They talked on the phone just yesterday. Every lunch time in fact. What was she on about. Maybe something happened to her, or dad.
Text two; Mom, again
This isn’t funny anymore. Call me back.
Three; Dad
You’re mother is worried sick. Why do you keep doing this to her? Call her. Now.
Four; Landlord Joe
FINAL WARNING. You’ve skipped out on your last two rent payments and we got a call from hydro and water that they’re shutting you off. If you cannot come up with the money by Friday, then you’re out.
Five; Dad, again
That’s it. If you don’t want our help then fine. I can’t watch you destroy your mother like this.
Her phone froze for a moment before the screen turned black and she was submerged into darkness once again.
What. The. Fuck. Was going on?
Where was Jared? Why was she getting eviction notices and threats from her father?
She needed light. Candle. There was one on Jared’s bedside table and a lighter in the drawer.
The candle was there but the dust mixed with dry wax on the wick made it terribly difficult to light.
She walked back into the closet. The warm glow emanating from the candle didn’t calm her nerves. Something was clearly wrong and she had no idea. She went to sleep and everything was normal, but then when she woke up it was like she was transported into an alternate reality. Maybe even a dreamstate.
More like a nightmare. Come to think of it. The idea of a nightmare sounded more and more plausible. The smell, the missing payments, the eviction. There was no way it was reality. They never missed a payment in their lives.
Jared’s side of the closet was a disaster. Everything was everywhere. His shoes littered the floor, it was surprising she didn’t trip on her way in before.
His sweaters were also everywhere. Thrown into corners, hanging off of door handles. A significant pile was growing beside the mirror. He didn’t mention having a meeting this morning but maybe he couldn’t figure out what to wear. There were more than enough times it looked like the closet just decided to throw up her clothes.
She walked over and kneeled down to run her fingers through the pile, feeling the soft material of each sweater, letting his smell fill her senses. She missed him. An ache deep down slammed against her heart and she gasped. It felt like she hadn’t seen him in forever. A yearning like none she’s even felt before threatened to rip her in half.
He didn’t call. Or message. It wasn’t lost on her.
Standing up, she caught her reflection almost shrieked. Was that her? Hair matted, oily, plastered to her head. Face blotchy, grey and treading very close to sickly. Was that Jared’s sweater she was wearing? Was she also wearing his pj pants too? She looked down. A weird stain above the left side of her chest.
Something gold caught her eye. Jared’s ring on a chain around her neck. Ring. Jared’s ring.
A wave of emotions. Memories invaded her mind.
Jared yelling. Jared leaving. A dangerous windstorm. Rain and hail pelting down from the heavens. Jared not coming home. A call. Jared won’t be coming home. Make plans. Black. Lots of black. It was all black. Someone make sure she eats. Someone make sure she showers. Did you go to work today? No. How about today? No. Maybe it’s time. Ok. Maybe it’s too soon. Yes. Too soon. Too soon written in stone. Too soon playing on the radio. Too soon written in books, in letters, in text messages, and poems, and verses and all over everything in her head. Get up. No more. Continue living. Don’t make me. Life goes on. Everyone moves on. Jared’s never coming home.
Let me take over. A voice. Familiar, wading at the edge of her mind. Playing with strings attached to her fingers, her toes, her arms, her legs.
You need me to take over. Coxing, pushing. Playing with the strings attached to her heart, her mind, her consciousness.
Jared is gone. He’s been gone for a long time. But you can’t handle it. I can. Let me handle it for you. Rest.
Jared is gone. She clutched the ring. Cold. Metal. It was just metal.
I can take over. Rest. Just rest.
The ring ignited in her hands. A hot searing pain. A black spot burned into her palm. Tears pricking the corners of her eyes.
Jared gone.
The voice yanked at each string and she give up control.
Rest it said forcefully. She succumbed.
---Prompt---
This is so good. I really felt the gradual realisation that she went through. I fully connected with her in the first few paragraphs and felt the heartbreak as reality set in. That was really cool.
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